Tedious Clown, The Eponymous First Blog.

Hello! This is my Blog. I decided to start a Blog and this is it. I thought of doing a Blog about a month ago but couldn't even think of a name for it so that's a good omen isn't it?

I initially thought of “Screaming Vacuum” as a title as I imagine that will be what I end up doing, venting spleen pointlessly into a void, ignored by all. However this is arguably too po faced as an opening gambit and if there is one thing I am not then it is proud of how constantly po faced I am.

My friend, DJ and Liverpudlian Jamie “No Wave” Finn suggested Kurt Vomit Guts as the title, which I loved and was the favourite for a long time. However I then remembered it is a fairly tortuous pun. It also struck me that having a blog may prove useful in looking for a job and I didn't want the following conversation to happen.

Ian McBigshot-Publisher: So is there anything else that sets you apart from the rest of these chaff pricks?

Me: Well I have a blog that proves I am ace at writing and that.

Ian McBigshot-Publisher: Och, Aye really? (Ian is Scottish) What's it called.

Me: Kurt Vomit Guts

Ian Mcbigshot-Publisher: Well get out then obviously.

Because the problem with Kurtvomitguts is that if you haven't heard of Kurt Vonnegut it just sounds like I love the name Kurt and think the idea of having human sick in your stomach is clever and amusing. Although to be fair if you haven't heard of Kurt Vonnegut I don't really want to work for you or for you to read my Blog. I should have just called it that really. Shit.

In the end I settled on Tedious Clown as it is nice and self deprecating and lays out of my game plan to be dull and sporadically amusing. I imagine if ol' Ian McBigshot heard this title he would be bloody impressed and give me the job there and then. Especially if the job title was “Assistant Consultant for Being Brilliant at Naming Blogs.”

I may well change the name of this Blog if the feedback is overwhelmingly negative. Or if there is any feedback at all. Is it possible to change a Blog's name after it's been set up? I hope so.

A real post will come soon.

Let's be friends yeah?

Gareth